Classes Offered

Find your Fantasy

Knowing what you want isn’t as easy as it sounds. Many people don’t even know what the options are, or have vague ideas about what appeals to them, but don’t have the language to express it. Especially when you’re new to the kink or sex positive scene, it can be easy to feel overwhelmed with choices.

In this class we’ll talk about ways to narrow down your desires from yes/no/maybe lists to explorations of common fantasies. We’ll also work through handouts and exercises that help us identify some of our early turn ons, and sensuality archetypes from the media, and we’ll use these seeds as a starting point for scenes you can create in real life.

Bring a partner and be ready to dive in to shared and solo exercises, with extra time at the end to continue exploring and practicing what you’ve learned.

 

Communication in the bedroom: asking for what you want

Knowing what you want isn’t as easy as it sounds. Asking for it can be even trickier. That kind of honesty puts us in a vulnerable place, and opens us up to rejection, or to being shamed for our desires. People of all genders and sexualities have a lot of cultural baggage to work through. From messages implying that wanting sex or pleasure is slutty (and that that’s a bad thing) to sex tips that make it sound like we’re supposed to be able to read our partners minds. All of this sets us up for failure, and for those reasons and more, many people never take the chance to open a dialog with their partner(s). But being able to talk about your wants and needs is the only way to get them met.

In this class we’ll talk about ways to put yourself and your partner at ease, styles of communication, and specific examples of tools and phrases to try. We’ll talk about ways to start the conversation and ways to incorporate communication into dirty talk. Not even sure what to ask for? We’ll talk about some common fantasies you might want to try.

 

Roughhousing for Adults: Rough Sex 101

From hair pulling to being pinned down, from spanking to negotiated face slapping — there are dozens of ways to add intensity to your sex. But getting rough means a bit more planning and communication than you might be used to. This class will show you a variety of rough sex techniques you can use to spice up your own bedroom play as well as teach you to do them safely. Stella will discuss power dynamics and roleplaying, building satisfying scenes, and how to ask for what you want and communicate with your partner about what you’d like to try. Demos on hair pulling, consensual slapping and hitting, and more will be included!

Bring your curiosity and an open mind and get ready to turn things up a notch!

 

Modern Dating: A Safe, Fun, and Practical Approach

Maybe you’re getting back into the dating game after a long break, or maybe dating has always seemed tricky – this class will give you the knowledge and tools to dive in!

These days, everyone has heard of online dating, even if they’ve never tried it. For a variety of reasons, online dating sites are increasingly the way people meet each other. With everyone working more and more, meeting people the old fashioned way, through friends or social gatherings, isn’t always practical.

So what are the considerations when meeting someone online? We’ll talk about how to write a compelling profile and present yourself in a flattering (and honest!) way, as well as ways to stay safe when meeting someone for the first, (or second, or third,) time. You’ll also learn current information about STIs, ways to protect yourself, and communication skills for bringing up the conversation with potential partners.

This class will also include a brief overview of different relationship styles, such as open relationships, polyamory, and swinging, so that you can have the information you need to decide what you’re looking for, and you’ll know what other people mean if they say that’s what they’re into.

By the end of this class there will be nothing stopping you from creating an awesome profile and going out to meet new people!

 

Ethical Relationships (College Audience)

This class will cover everything from choosing the relationship style that best suits you and your partner(s) to negotiating sex and sexual mismatches, to breaking up with kindness.

Did you know there were options beyond monogamy? While one style isn’t necessarily better than another, it’s helpful to know what your choices are. We’ll discuss ways to negotiate both monogamy and different flavors of non-monogamy such as polyamory and relationship anarchy.

What about when a relationship isn’t working? Whether you were together a few hours or a few years, we’ll talk about ways to split that are kind to everyone involved and that may form the groundwork for a future friendship.

This class is for people of all experience levels, including people with no dating or relationship experience at all! This is a shame free space to ask your questions (you can even ask anonymously) and is geared towards people of all genders and sexualities.

 

Empowering Enthusiastic Consent for Hotter Play and Better Sex!

Think you know everything there is to know about consent? Think again. It’s a lot more than a simple yes, and certainly more than the absence of a no. Even if you have experience negotiating and stating your needs and boundaries a lot of subtleties can go unexplored.

Some of our earliest memories include enduring unwanted touch; from hugs and pats on the head to pinches on the cheek and kisses from relatives, we’re trained to accept touch to be polite. That’s a lot of baggage to unpack.

This class isn’t the lecture you’re expecting. Sure, you’ll learn some facts and statistics but you’ll also have a chance to share your own experiences. Not only that, you’ll get up out of your seats to participate in (fully-clothed) exercises to help you learn what embodied consent feels like.

When our partners are completely comfortable knowing that we won’t cross lines, when we find our inner ‘yes,’ that’s when the really hot stuff can begin. Because consent isn’t just about asking for permission from others, it’s also about being in consent with yourself. This class will help you figure out what you want and how to ask for it.

 

Everything you need to know to have pleasurable sex! (College Audience)

Many people never get sex ed, and what we do get is far from comprehensive. If you’re lucky enough to get medically accurate information, it still doesn’t cover pleasure or communication.

In this class Stella will cover everything you need to know to make choices about your own safety and risk tolerance (without resorting to fear based tactics!) and you’ll even learn how to enjoy yourself! Some of the topics covered include safer sex supplies and conversations, discussing body part words, how to figure out what you like, how to set boundaries, and how to have your best sex!

This class is for people of all experience levels, including people with no experience at all! This is a shame free space to ask your questions (you can even ask anonymously) and is geared towards people of all genders and sexualities.

 

Kink 101

Kink and BDSM are all the rage these days, so maybe you’ve read something or seen something that caught your attention but you don’t know where to start in real life. With a little bit of information and know-how, you can start introducing kink into your own play right now!

Part of what’s sexy about kink is that it’s a way to communicate about and experiment with new things. Everyone likes a change of pace now and then. And kink presents some wonderful tools for playing with vulnerability and enhancing intimacy and connection.

No idea where to start, or what you’d even enjoy? No problem. This class will give an overview of common kinks and you’ll get a yes/no/maybe list to take home as a starting point to think about what you’d like to try. We’ll also discuss safety, consent, and negotiation and you’ll leave with ideas of how to incorporate a few kinks into your own sex life.

 

Mapping the Vulva: Anatomy, Communication, Touch, & Pleasure

There is so much confusion surrounding vulvas that it’s become a pop-culture joke, from Orange is the New Black to Gay Men Draw Vaginas — where even the title is inaccurate. Unfortunately, the joke is on us. With vulvas being a place of mystery (and worse, a source of shame), our ability to receive pleasure from this area of the body can be extremely diminished. This class will dispel misinformation and teach you all about the vulva — from anatomy to styles of touch. In addition to the external genitalia, we’ll also discuss the vagina, the G-spot, and the underlying anatomical structures.

With a focus on intimacy and connection, this class will cover styles of communication that will set both the giver and the receiver of touch at ease and give you tools to communicate your desires. There is a whole world of pleasure available if giver and receiver are willing to learn how to relax, open up, to touch and receive touch.

 

Wet & Wild: G-spot and squirting orgasms.

Ancient societies called it Amrita, the nectar of the gods. Pop culture regularly debates whether it’s urine. Whichever camp you fall in, squirting is a hot topic.

In this class, Stella Harris will cover internal and external anatomy with special emphasis on what is commonly known as the G-spot — but is becoming better understood as the clitourethrovaginal (CUV) complex. She’ll talk about everything from sex toys to touch techniques you can try alone or with a partner to experience an internal orgasm, and ways you can increase your chances of squirting.

Just as essential as sexual skills, Stella will discuss how to become comfortable with your body and with your partner, and ways to talk about touch and exploration that will put everyone at ease.

 

Penis to Prostate: A guide to internal and external pleasure

No one in our society has it easy when it comes to sex. Harmful ideas about the way sex and bodies should work can build shame and embarrassment for anyone who thinks they operate outside the mainstream porn example. For men/masculine identified people the emphasis on performance and “doing” can create a great deal of stress and anxiety. In this class you will learn anatomy along with techniques for touch and pleasure. We will discuss communication techniques and ways to create intimacy that don’t require an erection along with ways to relax, slow down, and enjoy a range of sensations without being goal oriented or rushing to a finish line.

Not everyone who has a penis or prostate is masculine identified. We’ll discuss ways to learn what language your partner likes to use around their body and we’ll touch on the experience of people who take hormones.

 

Strap-On For Play: Oral, Pegging, and More

Strap-ons can be enjoyed by givers and receivers of any gender. Enjoying play with a strap-on does not have to be tied to sexual or gender orientation – it can simply be one more tool in your sexual arsenal. This class will demystify playing with strap-ons and cover all the basics to get you started plus techniques for oral and penetrative play.

Any sex act is a full mind and body experience. That’s why the whole performance; body language, eye contact, and noises are incredibly important to the overall pleasure of everyone involved. When the cock you’re wearing or using doesn’t transfer sensation biologically, you have an opportunity to focus on the full experience.

We will discuss everything from choosing the right harness and dildo, to topics of safety, power exchange, dirty talk, and role play you can incorporate for a hot experience. We’ll also cover aspects of touching gender, as well as discovering the language people like to use around their body.

 

Three (or more) is company: Navigating threesomes, group sex, and play parties.

Studies show that multi-partner sex is the number one fantasy among American adults. But how do you make it happen? People have a hard enough time negotiating sex or kink with just one person. Adding more people to the mix can complicate things exponentially. But that doesn’t mean it has to be a hassle, a headache, or a recipe for disaster. If your communication and negotiation skills are on point you can have safe and fun play with as many people as your heart desires.

This class will discuss ways to check in with yourself before group play so you’re confidant about your boundaries, ways to negotiate with existing partners before adding people to the mix, and ways to facilitate happy & safe group experiences. We’ll cover everything from safety with multiple players, to threesome positions, to party etiquette, to asking for what you want.

 

Foolin’ Around: Introducing Toys in the Bedroom

Have you ever wondered how to introduce sex toys to your own bedroom play? Are you curious but don’t know where to start? Or maybe you’ve been using some toys for years, and want to expand beyond the basics— this class is for you.

We’ll talk about the best toys to use with partners from vibrators and dildos and butt plugs to kinky items like paddles and blindfolds and rope. We’ll also show you the benefits of wedges and supports to create more satisfying sex positions. This class has something for everyone and in addition to everything you’ll learn, the class itself is a perfect date night. Try something novel and naughty with your sweetie!

 

Introduction to Rope Bondage

Does the idea of restraint turn you on? Do you want to learn the building blocks of rope bondage? In this class you will learn basic safety along with the single column tie, double column tie, and a simple chest harness. With these fundamentals you will be able to improvise and create many different bondage positions and hot scenarios. You’ll also learn ways to use rope to build intimacy and connection while you’re tying, and tricks to help you build confidence as a beginner.

 

Tied Up – Now What?

Rope bondage has a huge appeal, but people often ask what happens next? This class answers that question. We’ll cover ways to make rope the whole point of your scene, as well as ways to use rope to facilitate other kinds of play, like impact, pressure points, sensation, and yes, even sex.

Stella’s rope play has a focus on intimacy and connection, and she uses rope as a tool to facilitate those goals, rather than for it’s own sake. This class won’t be showing you any new knots or ties, instead it will use whatever rope skills you already have and build from there. Don’t worry if you only know the basics, even dragging rope sensually across the skin counts as rope play.

 

Rope Bondage for Intimacy and Connection

This isn’t a rope class, first and foremost. No knots or ties will be taught. Rope is simply the tool we happen to be using to connect with our partners, and for this class you’ll use whatever rope skills you already have to maximize pleasure and connection. What you’ll learn are ways to negotiate a scene that take into account not just what you are going to do, but how you both want to feel. We’ll work through a series of exercises that help us hone in on our partner and our shared experience. We’ll also talk about ways to focus on your partner and drown out background distractions, even at parties.

 

Advanced Sexual Practices: Kink, Rough Sex, and BDSM (College audience)

From hair pulling to being pinned down, from spanking to negotiated face slapping — there are dozens of ways to add intensity to your sex. But getting rough means a bit more planning and communication than you might be used to.

This class will introduce a variety of kink, BDSM, and rough sex techniques as well as teaching you ways to play safe. We’ll cover power dynamics and roleplaying, and how to ask for what you want and communicate with your partner about what you’d like to try.

No idea where to start, or what you’d even enjoy? No problem. This class will give an overview of common kinks and you’ll get a yes/no/maybe list to use as a starting point to think about what you’d like to try.

 

You’re Good Enough, You’re Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like You; Battling Impostor Syndrome

Have you ever had a moment of panic before a class or client session when you’re sure that you have nothing to offer? That everyone already knows everything you know? There’s a name for that: Impostor Syndrome. The insidious belief that we’re not good enough can prevent us from offering our talents to the world, and it’s more than a simple confidence problem. But there’s good news: “Researchers find that impostorism is most often found among extremely talented and capable individuals, not people who are true impostors.”

So, how do you battle Impostor Syndrome and get your unique message out there? Once you’ve identified the problem, there are some tools and tricks you can use to conquer it.

We’ll discuss Impostor Syndrome and how it manifests, we’ll figure out how to identify when that’s what we’re experiencing, and we’ll talk about ways to get around it so we can be fiercely and authentically ourselves, and get our passion and message out into the world.

We’ll also go through a writing exercise to identify and express our values that has been used to fight Impostor Syndrome with such success that it helped eliminate gendered performance differences in a university physics class. Lastly, we’ll focus on ways to apply these principles and tools to our work on an ongoing basis.